THAT TIME I STOOD ON THE EDGE OF HOPE AND DEATH...

Actually, I'm still standing on that edge as I type these words. I don't know where this story is going to end up, but right now, things are pretty good.

But we need to go back, don't we? Lou received a call from Dr. V. and Nurse Janice on Thursday evening. Meanwhile, I was watching That Girl upstairs. Lou came up around 6:30 PM to tell me that he'd been talking to my oncology team and my bone marrow biopsy indicated my system was pretty much solely pumping out Myeloma cells and nothing else. By this metric, I was medically considered walking dead. Lou was informed that there was one last rescue procedure and that if anyone could survive it, it was me.

The procedure requires a five-day stay during which time the patient is plied with around-the-clock chemo. Two of the chemo drugs are long-unused drugs that have been replaced by ones with kinder side-effects. These side-effects include heavy nausea, body pain, and hair loss. Thankfully, there are modern remedies for those issues. Except for the hair loss. The other two also carry along with them similar side-effects.

And death. I forgot to add that. This last attempt at course correction Dr. V said, "works for some people, but not all people."

Why does Dr. V. think I am a good candidate for this lethal procedure? My age, overall level of health coming into this, my absolutely expansive support system (thank you to you for being a part of my army... again!), the amount of spiritual support coming from a number of faiths, and of course, the support of my husband, Lou.

So here I am in room 23, a private room to protect my fragile state, 25-hours since I was admitted, and making fast friends with the staff as I do. I was hooked up to Harold, the name I gave to my IV "tree", at 4 PM today. Things are going fine so far. The Zofran and Compazine (anti-nausea drugs) seem to be doing the trick. Whatever else that's going into me is also taking away the little pains and spasms and that gives me hope that I might be able to sleep for the first time in weeks--maybe months!

Anyhow, that's where things are so far. If it goes well, I will be returned home and following a regimen of antibiotics and scheduled appointments. I'll probably have to undergo another bone marrow biopsy to see if the rescue worked and if I can return to my formerly scheduled chemo infusions and drug regimen. If we are "close", I will be doing this 5-day stay again in 28 days.

More to come (because I said so!)...